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Assassin
Assassins are hired killer folk.
Etymology
The word assassin comes from ass, ass again (because, presumably, assassins were thought to be asses back when the English language was invented), and an in because "assass" sounds gay.
History
The first assassin appeared in the year 599. It is unknown his name was, but everyone agreed that he was such a big ass that the word "assassin" was coined in honor of that fact. Despite this, however, he was adept at killing people, which made him important. The public then recognized the usefulness of hired killer folk, causing the demand of assassins to shoot high up.
In the year 2000, it was estimated that about there were about half a bahmillion assassins available for hire, costing from $9.99 per hour to $599 per hour.
Differences between Assassins and Thugs
Assassins are stealthy and are hired to take out a specific person or people. They are intelligent and know to avoid unnecessary confrontations, because stealth is key. However, thugs are not so smart and have the estimated brainpower of a gorilla. They are usually used to scare people into giving up cash, or just beating the shit out of people.
People and organizations known or rumored to hire assassins
Known
Rumored
- AbConNet (some believe it exists)
- United States of Nooooooooooo
